Sneak peaks- It's a girl!

This will probably be a short post about a very special day.
Today was our 3d ultrasound.....
Yes- I know... I would have been the first one to tell you ( pre-pregnancy) that those ultrasounds are ultra-creepy. You can see all the fine and not yet fully formed details of you growing baby- and you will be meeting them soon anyways- so whats the point?! Besides they always seem to resemble at little E.T.
Haha... I caved... and oh how my tune has changed.... and I absolutely LOVED every minute!!
True- it may still be slightly creepy taking such a close look into the womb early on..... but it is amazing. It's entrancing and its a beautiful experience. I've actually just spent the last 2 hours re-watching the dvd we took home. Scrutinizing every face and spontaneous movement. Laughing at the little yawns, unintentional smiles and scowls... and those chubby little cheeks.
I've been looking at baby in a new light.
As our baby girl!
That is correct.... it has been confirmed and I have video evidence of little girl parts. I feel like I can finally start to plan a little more now!
Watching her squirm around on screen was a little emotional. So real.  And of course, being a nurse.... I was analazing features to ensure the look of a healthy babe ( ear and eye placement, formed lips ect). Thankfully, paranoia was fleeting, and I began to really relax and enjoy the show.
The nurse doing the ultrasound told us she had very dainty features... and that she had set a record for changing positions ( in and out of breach 3 times)....
So bizarre that we have the technology to do this...
So wonderful....
Sooooooo in love.

Now as I sit here and feel her kicks, I am picturing her as she was in the ultrasound, cuddling up, making faces and definetly looking more and more like a real baby everyday.

Guess its just about time to start shopping! I can't wait to put a frilly headband around that head of hair!

First look at our baby girl!

Pointing ( aka attempting a peace sign haha)

Covering up

Yawns

Squinting and making faces

Sooo much hair already!

Legs

Cuddled up in a ball

Karate Kid

I can't believe I actually caught this on camera finally... remember how I said I sit and stare at my belly alot? Well this is why!! :)

Baby Names

Long before I ever even thought about actually getting pregnant or being a mom, I thought about baby names. I was one of those girls that swore I would never get married or have children, but always seemed to have a running baby name list hidden somewheres. Late night sleepovers with close friends were always a perfect time to talk nonsense about the names of our unborn children.
Who knew that ACTUALLY naming your offspring would be such a big deal!  Suddenly when I dig up all those old lists they seem sub-par.... and a little "out there" .... Haiku, Merlin, and Garcia....??? seriously where was I and what was I psychedelic cloud was over my head. ( like I said--- from high school..)... Don`t worry- names like this have promptly been eliminated ( and chuckled at).
I`ve started to notice many dynamics to this whole baby-naming process....
First and foremost two people have to agree on the same name...which can be difficult, entertaining and frustrating all at the same time.
There are so many things to consider.... what the initials will spell, what it can be shortened to, the inevetivatble nickname, how it sounds being shouted from the front door step, what first impression it might give on a blind date, how it sounds as a baby, a kid, a teen, an adult... is it too plain, too popular, too trendy or too wierd?  Should you choose a family name or one you found on your own?
And then you make a long list.... get rid of any and all of the names that give you or your partner any negative feelings from people in your past or present, ( like that girl in kindergarden named Amber that used to choke you, geeky exes, mean bosses, permiscious girls, annoying children, ect ect ect).... Then that long list becomes a short list... and then you seem to test out the names in daily life until you have thought about it so much that when you say any of those names out loud ... they don't even sound like a normal name or word anymore. ....... hahah  ( no.... I haven't thought about this much) ...
And then there is the gentle fear of disclosing potential names. There are the poor reactions, the chance of getting that name "outed" and nabbed  by someone who will probably give birth the day before you do... and  then you would have to start the process all over again....
Surprisingly enough-- I've also found that living here on this island of less than 3000 people-- it makes it even a little more tricky--- because "everyone knows someone" with  "that name"... so it seems like there's a bit more pressure to pick an original. I would never think about "what the other children in my future baby's grad class" will be named.... but in a small community-- all of those thoughts pop into your head.
Its a big responsibility to give someone the name that they will have forever.... and you want to do a good job, and give them a good first impression on the world.
Its also incredibly fun and makes for a lot of late night laughs-- especially when a random name spurts out of one of our mouths for the others firing line....

We have our short list.... but I have a feeling it may change multiple times over the next 3-4 mths.  As a chronically indecisive person, I am trying my hardest not to give all of the names I like in one unnaturally lenghtly name...
Wish us luck!

Baby Post Back-log

So since I'm pregnant I get to use the excuse of being tired of unmotivated right??  haha..
Sorry- I'm going back to my 1st trimester ways and telling a bit of a lie there... but it would have been pretty believable probably. Since I've turned a new leaf with being truthful about this whole experience back at the 16 week mark I might as well cut the act.
I have been away from the computer doing... well... everything I finally have this new found energy for. This has entailed lots of hiking with friends, painting the nursery, a little bit of gardening ( yes that just came out of my mouth), lots of back to back 12hr shifts ( days and nights) on both the island and the city, trips to the beach, running with the dogs, occasional sober driving and weekend socialising.... and lets not forget those exhilarating prenatal visits... haha.... Oh- and hours of baby name searching in all my spare time...
All in all.... its been a great and busy couple of weeks.  I am still struggling to get used to this growing body--- ( it really just keeps getting bigger!!)-- but these past few weeks I've been doing a bit better at embracing the bulge ;)

Here's a little view of me today- at 23 weeks
Just before heading to work

It seems to be a little bit of a different shape-- even since last night... and hard like a little soccer ball!

Bloggin'

I just had an interesting thought...
Blogging is something I've always wanted to do in some form or another. Usually, I went with the old fashioned less public blog, known as a diary, but blogging is a whole other world.
The question I am laying here asking myself.. is Why now? I have had a pretty interesting, adventure filled life... jam packed with one of a kind experiences, lots of travel, an abundance of hilarity. I have actually made it into two books that other people wrote and published.... but I have never wrote about the juicy, life changing experiences that I've had. Instead I choose a time when all I can do is write about my 101 issues with pregnancy, settling down and being normal. Am I really just now realising that is bizarre?
Maybe all that adventure felt normal.... and this is the really the most foreign I have felt in my own skin.. ..maybe ever.
Hmmm....

Stonger kicks...

I'm sitting here on our couch, feeling lots of little kicks, rolls  and punches. They are getting stronger, more recognisable and much more frequent. It is an indescribable feeling that I absolutely love.
Tonight, since I am having some quite time by myself... I pull up my shirt and just watch and wait.... I can almost predict when and where these little jabs are coming ( I guess I can feel alot more than I thought)...
And then I see it... a little bump in my belly come and go. I can't even help but to smile and let out a little giggle. Every little kick feels like confirmation that our little babe is getting bigger and stronger. Especially since it is not just little flutters anymore--
I'm sure I am driving Robby crazy, but I think he understands. Everytime I get a few strong jabs in a row-- I call him over to "feel the baby". Of course, his rugged man hands usually just miss all the action. He assures be that eventually he'll feel it... but I think I am excited for when he gets that first punch too.

Its incredible how connected these little movements have made me feel. They can strike at any time, and its fun to try to figure out patterns of when baby seems to move around more.  I'm realising how much I actually hold and rub my baby already... and how for the next 4 months or so, I'm the only one who gets to have this special 24/7 kind of bond.

Okay- enough writing for tonight... these sensations are still new enough that they distract me at the moment they are happening to say or write anything intelligent... so off I go to sit, watch, feel, and enjoy it!

Whose body?

Today I am officially 20 weeks pregnant. That means that half of this pregnancy is over! How crazy is that.
Everyday I wake up feeling a little bit bigger ( but almost not big enough at the same time) and I look at my changing body like its the first time I've seen it. Sure... it doesn't look all that different to everyone else.. but to me... it's constantly changing.
It's those strange little things that I really notice.
For instance, if I try to lay my head on the table ( I do this often when I write or am trying to catch some zzz's on the ferry).. I can feel my abdomen lay on the tops of my thighs.
Sneezing- how come no one warned me of the dangers of sneezing while pregnant ( no-- I don't pee myself.... yet)... but if I sneeze when my legs are our straight or if I am laying down... I get the most bizarre- make you cringe- sensations in my stomach. Its like every time I sneeze I pull my stomach muscles and the baby gets all twisted up. Like I said... strange.
Also- leg cramping. Oh how I used to love stretching out as tall as I could every morning before jumping out of bed! Not anymore. If I stretch out like that now, it does not end in a cute little sigh... but instead violent silent screaming due to bilateral "charlie-horses" in my pudgy little calf muscles. Most mornings I forget and continue to attempt the full  body stretch.... eventually I'll learn.
My belly looks unrecognisable to me when I catch a glance in the mirror. But I think I am still in the awkward- just past bloated-stage. I  find it strange that there is a baby the size of a small cantaloupe hiding under there and most people tell me I don't look 5 mths pregnant, but I sure do feel it! Sometimes I wish it looked a little more like a plump little pregnant belly, but I'm sure it will come.  I don't really mind the belly- and am getting quite attached to it. I also feel like my sides are starting to widen to make room for everything... which gives a completely new shape I am not used to just yet.
And my "inny" belly-button... has turned into an "inbetweeny"... I think its just a matter of time before it is inside out because sometimes it aches. haha... Its odd staring at the center of your umbilicus- when it feels like you have never seen it before.
The bladder issue- well I won't waste anymore time than I already do on this. But it seems all I have to do is look at a glass of water and I'm running for the bathroom. Our 4 mth old puppy can officially hold his pee longer than I can.
There are definitely perks though!
Going up a jean size... not so fun..... going up a bra size for the first time since middle school?! Bring it on!
I love these new "perks". I actually have a decent amount of cleavage, fill out all my bras and don't have to worry about being called "boards" by my high school friends anymore ( at least for another 4 mths ) :) Its fantastic. I don't think Rob minds either.
My hair and nails seem to be growing at light speed... and I don't shed nearly as much. It seems its growing in lighter than usual as well ( or it could just be my long lost natural color finally making an appearance after 12 years of haircolor).

So lots of little weird changes for me... just a little bit of belly to everyone else.
I hope this doesn't sound like complaining... because despite all of these changes my body is going through... I actually feel great.
I rarely get sick and finally have energy to exercise, hang out with friends, do yoga, hooping and endure multiple 12 hr shifts again.
2nd trimester has been kind so far... let's see what the next few weeks bring...

Moi- At 20 weeks!